Introducing the LONG over due arrival of Hannah Dawn Wondra

Introducing the LONG over due arrival of Hannah Dawn Wondra

Born 12-20-11 at 4:41 p.m. 6 lb 8 oz 18 inches

Finally physically in Mommy's arms.

Hannah, Mommy and Birth Mother.

Birth Mothers are amazing..

I know I have said it before, but could you imagine creating a life, carrying for 9 months knowing you cannot provide what the child deserves in life, giving birth and then handing over the little tiny life to her proper Mommy and Daddy?

It takes so much strength over such a long  period of time to do this.

God chooses who is strong enough to be a birth mother, to carry and grow a child safely until birth.

And then he chooses who is strong enough to love that life like no one else can. To love that child like he/she was created by blood in your family, but love that child even more than that, because of the work beyond pregnancy that goes into having that child.

Thank you to Hannah's birth mother for giving her the life she deserves to have and for making Tammy and Mark's dreams come true.

We have watched them go through so much and it's now finally

over.

The best is yet to come for them.

And I cant wait to watch it all happen.

*updated to add*

As of 21 Dec:

Baby Hannah update from Tammy Gustafson Wondra herself, "BM has relinguished rights and Hannah is legally ours. Feeling so sad for the BM Please keep her in your prayers! We are feeling so overwhelmed by the support and love you guys have given us. Thank you so much!"

Update on baby Hannah

Induction date is set for Dec 20th.

Tammy and Mark will have their Christmas miracle this year.

I couldn't ask for a better present.

Amazing.

Santa is stopping by early this year/ Tammy and Mark

So, Nick was informed that our household goods will take 54 days to get to New Mexico. You know what this means? Our household items need to be shipped out no later then the 2nd week of December if we want our things to arrive in New Mexico around the same time as us.

So this means that the first weekend in December Santa needs to make his visit so all the toys and Christmas decorations can be shipped off to NM.

So, that Santa countdown timer for us is no more. Santa will be here at the Alessi's house in less than 3 weeks. And with no oven to make Christmas dinner...maybe some ham steaks fried on the stove? And for actual Christmas Day- an afternoon on the beach? Because when the heck else are we going to be able to do that!? ;0)

Talk about Christmas not feeling like Christmas. Not only does it already feel like it doesn't exist because of the tropical weather, now we have to push it ahead by 3 weeks. Oh joy.

My first Christmas package of the year will be mailed out this weekend. At least I can avoid the long lines.

On another note....

My right side bar has the chip in button to help Tammy and Mark bring Hannah home. Remember they were finally matched after YEARS with a birth mother, but this particular situation is bringing them 10 grand over budget and they are asking for all the help they can get.

I tried to do a fundraiser but will end up cancelling that because only ONE person volunteered to bake goods for us. Its not worth it. Its more disappointing than anything. Humans can be so selfish and greedy. I understand people are on budgets, I understand the time of year being around Christmas. But really... donate 50 cents. Give a nice word of encouragement. That is free.

I guess it kills me because with both of our adoptions, we had so much help. We had people showing up at our doorstep with trash bags full of baby items, we had people offer us items for free, we had people asking how they can donate money to us, we had a ransom envelope thrown at the front door with our last name on it spelled wrong, with hundreds of dollars in it to help with Caden's travel expenses. I am, and always will be forever grateful, and thankful for all the heart people showed us during those times. I so much so want to just pay it forward to Tammy and Mark. I cant think of a better reason to work hard and give our all to them. I cant think of a better reason for us to not be able to go out for dinner because we gave the money to Tammy and Mark instead. And it just sucks that others cant help or feel the same. Tis the season for giving, right?

So, I will be cancelling the fundraiser and seeing what we can do on our own. I donated $5 to them this morning. I know $5 isnt much but every penny helps in type of situation. That was just $5 until Nick gives me the OK to donate more. He is the bookkeeper around here. I know nothing about our finances. Besides, every penny helps...this I know from experience. Also, on Saturday morning I will be mailing them a package loaded with Johnson and Johnson products as well as a handmade gift that I will be sharing with you all on here soon. (Tammy, dont worry- I will post a spoiler alert for you if you don't want to see it prior to it arriving at your door)

Also, if you wish, you can mail your unwanted, or outgrown baby girl items to the Wondra's personally. I can give you their mailing address...just send me a comment and I will get it to you. The Wondra's would appreciate it. I know it's hard, nearly impossible, to go out and purchase baby items when you are pinching pennies trying to pay for the adoption expenses.

Jennifer, from Little Crazy Family- will be mailing a care package of this sort. Thank you Jennifer! I knew you and I get along for some reason. We both have heart for this sort of thing from personal experiences.

I cant wait to someday meet Tammy, Mark and baby Hannah...and Jennifer and Noey! Who knows, with once special thing in common, our children could make life long friendships together as well.

So, there you have it. Early Christmas. 76 days until we are off this island. Help Tammy and Mark.

Fundraiser

Friends and family far and near,
Help us raise funds for our good friends, the Wondra family. They, like us, are building their family through the miracle of adoption. After waiting YEARS to be matched with a baby, they are finally bringing their baby daughter (Hannah Dawn) home, she is due at the end of this year. This match has brought them $10,000 over their adoption cost budget, so we ask you if you could, either donate baked items to us, unwanted items to us, or if you are miles away you can donate directly to the Wondra family through them or us. Please help a Christmas miracle and give this little girl the home that she deserves to be born into. You can visit the Wondra family here: http://twondra.blogspot.com/. 
If you cannot donate, then we ask you to just simply share this with others and offer words of kindness and thoughts and prayers for everything to go as smoothly as possible.
Thank you all.
The Alessi Family

Tammy and Mark

Just 3 weeks ago I blogged about Tammy and Mark. You can read that post here.

And now...

Now they have gotten the call. They have been matched with their daughter to be born the end of this year.

I can hardly believe it.

Here blog is here. http://twondra.blogspot.com/ But here is the story. As you can imagine I have been stalking her blog and her facebook.

FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 11, 2011

The story

This day has been such a huge whirlwind as you can imagine! So many phone calls, emails, etc. I apologize for not coming back here before now, but it's been crazy!

I want to thank you all for your wonderful comments and support and love. It truly means so much to us! There have been so many and I hope to respond soon!

Here's the story:

About a month ago we had inquired about 2 situations that were on the agency’s website: Situation B and L. Unfortunately, situation L was about $10,000 over budget so we requested not to have our profile submitted but we said we wanted to have our profile submitted to situation B.

Fast forward to yesterday and we get an email from our agency saying there is a situation where the birthmom is due 11/11/11 (yes, today!). We asked to have our profile submitted.

When I got back from gymnastics, I had an email saying that “L likes us” and gave us contact info. I was confused. I knew a month ago we had asked about an “L situation” but knew it was over budget and we declined it. I thought maybe perhaps this birthmom we had just submitted to had the same name.

When I called the agency, she told us she had good news and that L loved us and really wanted us. I asked if this was the one due 11/11/11 to which I was told no and that L was due the end of December.

I was literally dumbfounded. I didn’t know what to say. Shocked is an understatement. My first thought was how in the world could this happen? We didn’t even submit. Then I started worrying about the money as I knew this was $10,000 over budget.

Then I was completely and totally amazed at the sincere power of God.

Only God could let this happen and only God knew this would.

We were told this “never happens” and it was a surprise. We’re still trying to figure out what happened and of course worried about where this $10,000 will come from but we also know this is our daughter. God has meant for this to be our daughter.

What are the chances?

The latest news on her face book is that they did have a conference call with their birth mother and it went great. Birth mother is very happy with her choice and says that Tammy and Mark are the only family for her.

I cannot believe it. This has been A LONG time in waiting. So long. Too long. And now I can finally watch them begin the next phase and the best phase of life...parenthood. 

I cant wait to begin a long road trip to see them and their baby girl, Hannah Dawn.

Tammy and Mark Wondra

Meet Tammy and Mark Wondra. <--- click here to access their blog.

I 'met' them years ago via an internet chat room for the sperm bank that we were using when trying to conceive many many moons ago, back in 2006. Fast forward to 2011, and 5 years later I have watched them struggle more than any human being with the desire to parent should ever have to go through. Although we have never physically met or talked, I consider them to be very close friends. I even would consider them to be on the line of family. I look forward to the day we meet, because it will and must happen.

We have our children, now 3years old and 20 months old, and their arms are still physically empty. Our loses seem so minimal compared to them. We only went through 10 intra-uterine insemination's, 1 IVF and only 2 miscarriages. We adopted Kayla at birth with only 2 months notice, only 2 months after our 2nd miscarriage. We adopted Caden at birth from the same birth mother within 2 months of even knowing she was pregnant only 18 months and 5 days after Kayla's birth. The loss of life and finances during the trying to conceive years through the adoption processes seems like a lifetime ago. In some ways it feels like it never even happened.  We are so happy with the way our lives turned out that those years are so far under the carpet.

Yet, Tammy and Mark still struggle to reach their dreams. The simple dream of just being parents. The one thing that everyone else gets so easily, so naturally...they STRUGGLE to get. They have so much more loss than we have had and I thought I was at the end of my rope during it all.

 I hate knowing they are STILL going through all the heartache that I went through trying to be a mom. I dont know how in the world Tammy still goes through this each and every day of her life. That right there is some hope, determination and strength at it's finest.

As you all may or may not know, adoption is NOT cheap. Between Kayla and Caden total costs for the adoptions cannot be fully counted for. It would be impossible but we have a guess as to around $60,000 combined total. This is to include travel costs, flight costs to and from Guam for EACH adoption, flying to PA to stay with family until the time of birth in which we had to fly to FL, hotel in FL, rental car in FL, gas, meals, entertainment in FL (which we did as cheap as possible) attorney costs, court costs, phone calls costs, paperwork costs, notary costs, home study costs (which for Kayla we had to fly a social worker from Japan to Guam and pay for her hotel so she could visit us 2 times as required, and pay for her meals and transportation from hotel to our house), the cost of mailing documents (overnight priority from Guam which is impossible!) and the costs of getting baby needs together TWICE in short notice! (Thank goodness for good caring people and friends who threw baby showers and randomly showed up at doorstep to donate trash bags full of clothes and toys and also to the random person who donated a generous amount of cash for travel costs for flying back to get Caden!) And THANK GOD for the Grandparents to be who helped more than we could have ever asked for!

This list could seriously go on. I mean seriously. Adoption is.not.cheap. And this on top of all the money lost when trying to create our own baby for many years prior to this and just ending up in miscarriage to start all over again. Its just is sad and seems so unfair that for a simple wish and desire for some people to make families and become parents, they must go through all this.

(And here we are considering the international adoption road in the future for baby number 3! We are nuts! NUTS!)

Tammy and Mark have done and are doing all they can to tie a knot at the end of their rope and hold on tightly until they are matched with their baby. They are currently in the process of submitting their profile to birth mothers hoping and praying that one birth mother believes in them. I hate waiting for this and not being able to do anything about it. It totally allows me to understand why surrogate mothers offer their bodies up to grow babies for families in need.

Please take a moment and check out Tammy's Peanut fund website, Wondra Peanut Fund.
If you see something you like contact her. I have the pleasure of owning some of the hand made items her mother makes and I can say they are great quality items that I will keep forever and even get to tell the story about where it came from with my children. You can even just donate if you wish to not purchase items. Or you can even just send a message of support. That is always appreciated just as much, trust me...I know.

Or if you could, just spread the word. YOU NEVER KNOW WHO WILL READ IT. This my folks is how our birth mother found us. Just word of mouth. It change lives forever.

(one of my all time favorite silly picture of Tammy and Mark)

lol, ok...on a more serious note...

The post I told you to stay tuned for!

If you are an adoptive parent you understand 110% the meaning and feeling of the phrase, Born In My Heart.

It literally feels like your children were created in your heart because you loved them long before they even existed. It feels like you carried them for much longer than 9 months in your heart. The moment you laid eyes on them it feels like your heart gave birth to them and every frustrating, exhausting, expensive moment of the roller coaster ride that brought you two together was worth it and you would do it all over. You would do it all over again in a heart beat. 

And doing it all over again has been a topic in the Alessi house. WE ARE CRAZY. Are we?

Before contact with our birth mother we knew adoption was the way to make our family and we started saving for an international adoption a few years down the road from either Kazakhstan or Russia. 2 months later our birth mother contacted us through MySpace and that idea went out the window immediately. Nick came home from work the day Kaitlyn sent me the message asking us to consider adopting her unborn daughter and I asked him seconds after coming the door, "If we could have a baby by August, would you?" And he said, "YES!" It was mid May and July 30th she was born.

We knew that a domestic semi open adoption through this birth mother was where we were being led and that this baby girl was meant to be ours. When she was born life was complete. I was always open to the idea of more babies in the future weather it be through adoption again or more infertility treatments. Nick felt like life was pretty much complete but his mind slowly changed over time once he deployed and missed out on most of Kayla's infancy.

Then we found out our birth mother was pregnant again with a boy and wanted us to adopt him as well. I knew and I fought HARD for him. I knew that he was supposed to be ours because of the gut feeling of wanting more children in the future. I just had no idea how close that future was! 

When he was born life was COMPLETE. One girl, one boy, biologically half brother and half sister from the same birth mother. WE COULD NOT ASK FOR MORE. We were done!

Now that boy is 20 months old TODAY. I wouldn't say we have the 'itch' but I defiantly would like to expand our family and the hubby is open to it. I dont yet have the desire I had prior to our first baby, our daughter, of 'I need a baby like yesterday.' I dont have the desire I had after our first born before our 2nd born of, 'We should have another baby like next month." But I do/we do have the thought of, 'we should consider expanding the family in 2 years."

Call us crazy. But, the time period of immense stress that you think you would NEVER go through again, called the adoption process...is worth every moment and every penny spent.

I don't know how we will go about it. DEFIANTLY NOT INFERTILITY TREATMENTS! It's j ust not worth it to us. Adoption will be the route again. 6 months ago Nick would tell me, "I dont think we are done yet." I thought he was crazy. But now my thoughts have changed. And after seeing Tracey and Vera come together through adoption from Russia, my thoughts and feelings have changed completely.  I mean, why not do something greater for yourself, for your family and for a child?  and give another child a family and a chance at life? I think its what we are destined to do. Not only did this husband and wife come together in this life for each other, to better each other, to complete each other, but we came together in this life because we were meant for this. We made a good team of adoptive parents. 

I dont know how a possible 3rd baby will come to be, but that will be figured out and we will be led to know how we are supposed to do this in due time. We move in 4 months and need to focus on other things like buying a house and a 2nd car and getting settled into a new state and home. Then we will see where the good Lord takes us.

Another domestic semi open adoption? Or try International Adoption this time? 2 totally different things.

Do we want to go through an agency and make a profile about our family and submit to who knows how many birth mothers waiting and hoping that she will pick us? We think we could be chosen fairly quickly due to the fact that birth mothers might love to put their child into our family since we already have 2 adopted children and the solid foundation of the military lifestyle. Do we want to wait through a pregnancy and hope that she doesn't change her mind by the time the baby is due? DO we want to the stress of terminating the birth parents rights, the birth father not contesting the adoption? Do we want another newborn baby straight from the hospital as we did with Kayla and Caden? Do we want to expand our family not just by another newborn but by another birth mother and another birth father? 

Or,

Do we want to go through an agency and be matched with an infant or toddler from an orphanage in another country? Which can take up to a year or longer but would be worth the wait.  We could 'rescue' a baby from a family-less life and give them endless opportunities with life in the USA such as education, plus 2 parents, 2 siblings, Grandparents and Aunts and Uncles. Not only for this child, but for the children we already have, I think this would be a great learning experience for them. This is the route I am currently thinking. This is the route we originally planned on going prior to our birth mother finding out about us through  MySpace over 3 years ago. This way of adoption has always stuck in the back of my brain  but now its coming more so to the front of my brain and I'm pretty sure I have Tracey and Vera to thank for that.

I do know that more pitter patter of tiny feet through the house, and more giggles, laughs, cries, screams, toys, dirty laundry, cooking, being tired, more sippy cups in the sink, less money spent on ourselves and more on diapers, hearing little baby voices yell MAMA and DADA...is all what I/we live for.

Why not make the world a better place by showing another child what life is all about? We only live once. We must make the best of it and follow where ever our hearts led us. Not to mention, the more children we have the more grand children we will have to love and spoil and then give back! HA!

Maybe it's baby number 3. Maybe its another domestic semi open adoption, maybe its a new adventure in life via international adoption. Maybe not.

(Mom- would you be ready for a possible 5th grand child?! )